Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
