You really coming over, don't trick.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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