I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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