piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
