idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
