Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
