About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
