you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
