i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
