ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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