how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
