David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
