yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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