I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I could fuck to npr.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
