It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
COCAINE IS GR8
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
