I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
