I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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