Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
