You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
