i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
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