my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
