just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
