ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
