I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
