where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
