After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
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