She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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