yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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