What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
you never un-have a 4some
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
