I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
