Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
