i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
