She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
