it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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