Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
