...so i touched it.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
