Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
