His pubic hair was longer than his dick
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I don't deserve a penis
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize