What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Randomize
