Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
