I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
this hospital has no fireball
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
