"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
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