Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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