If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
