Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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