Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize