3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
My vagina just recognized that song.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
