finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
