is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
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