DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Randomize
